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Thousands of the best, funny, witty, hilarious, crazy, silly Facebook statuses and sayings. If you are looking for a funny status or funny saying, you can find them here.

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Updating my status in the car. Donít worry, Iím in the passenger seat. Which makes it harder to drive, but fools the cops.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 08.13.11 @ 10:32am

It's the weekend!!! The " Responsible Adult Button" has been switched to OFF!!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 08.13.11 @ 10:31am

Watch out! Itís quite possible some of my best mistakes havenít been made yet.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 08.13.11 @ 09:59am

Itís what people donít know about each other that makes them such good friends.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 08.12.11 @ 22:20pm

Itís not what you wear; itís how you take it off.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 08.12.11 @ 20:21pm

I see youíre playing stupid. Looks like youíre winning too.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 08.12.11 @ 15:00pm

my entire life is a "had to be there" moment
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 08.12.11 @ 14:51pm

is 100% sure that you are looking at my status. (:
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 08.12.11 @ 14:50pm

Iím bored enough to clean.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:42pm

what do you mean booze ain't food!?
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:28pm

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I'm not real excited that the wrapping on my toilet paper said '100% Recycled'.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:27pm

is pondering why people have a favorite color M&M when they all taste the same!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:27pm

thinks we should all jump out of our chairs and do the 5 second happy dance! READY! GO!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:26pm

is admitting to pushing Humpty Dumpty, he had it coming!!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 08.10.11 @ 14:24pm

hmmmm...halo or horns today??
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 20:15pm

Accept the craziness. Life will be a bore without it.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 20:03pm

The nice thing about being single is when you're setting the silverware, it doesn't matter which side you put the remote on.†
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 15:38pm

If you want to get me to do something, bribery does work.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 15:38pm

is bored of being bored because being bored is boring.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 15:37pm

There's no rehab for stupid! ;P
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 08.8.11 @ 15:36pm

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