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Thousands of the best, funny, witty, hilarious, crazy, silly Facebook statuses and sayings. If you are looking for a funny status or funny saying, you can find them here.

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I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 20:41pm

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Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 20:04pm

This day needs more tomfoolery!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 19:22pm

thinking men should come with a carfax....
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 19:21pm

“Delete, Block, Ignore” Its too bad getting rid of people in life is not as easy as it is on Facebook..
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 18:48pm

I know right from wrong. Wrong is the fun one.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:45pm

At least a stalker is there for you.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:41pm

All I want is a little more than I’ll ever get.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:38pm

Born free. Now, I’m expensive.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:36pm

The future is much like the present, only longer.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:35pm

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Women want a lot of things from one man. Conversely, men want one thing from a lot of women.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 16:17pm

A golden rule to live by: Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 11:30am

The one thing you never wanna hear when your father catches you watching porn is... "Scoot over."
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 11:28am

I only drank twice last week....Once for three days and once for four days
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 11:28am

Dear Friday, I'm ready !!!
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Thursday, 09.29.11 @ 00:28am

Been there, done that. allegedly
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 09.28.11 @ 23:48pm

Everything just seems much better when you're in denial
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 09.28.11 @ 23:48pm

I try not to brag but I'm really quite good at Yoga. I'm not flexible or anything but I am a master of that "Empty Your Mind" part
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 09.28.11 @ 23:46pm

I would rather have a bad day of fishing then a good day of work.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 09.28.11 @ 19:33pm

I'm so scattered I don't know whether I found this rope or lost my horse.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 09.28.11 @ 19:22pm

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