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Thousands of the best, funny, witty, hilarious, crazy, silly Facebook statuses and sayings. If you are looking for a funny status or funny saying, you can find them here.

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is in his own little world but itīs okay they know me here.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

if I was a bird, I know who Iīd poop on first.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

A synonym is a word you use when you canīt spell the word you first thought of.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Iīm not insensitive, I just donīt care.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

When you wish upon a shooting star, all your dreams will come true. Unless the star is really a meteor about to destroy the earth. Then, youīre pretty much dead no matter what you wish for.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

I Like this quote. I dislike this quote. I am so clever that sometimes I donīt understand a single word of what I am saying.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

I try not to work that much. That way I make less mistakes.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

I know u r but what am I ?
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

There are no problems which cannot be solved through suitable application of high explosives.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Make yourself at home. Clean my kitchen
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

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Always look out for #1. Donīt step in #2 either.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Never hire a color blind Bomb Technician.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

is cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

I want it all and I want it delivered.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

is on a Mission. The magic leprechaun told me to follow the pink racehorse to the rainbow where the orange elephant is holding my skittles hostage
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery wonīt spoil me.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere "Hold my purse."
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

You are here: X
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

Do you ever notice that when youīre driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 05.17.11 @ 19:30pm

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