What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.

How does a blond turn the light on in the morning? Open the car door.

Did you hear about the blonde prisoner who was found in his cell with half a dozen bumps on his head? He tried to hang himself with a bungee cord.

Why do blondes stare at juice cartons? the lable says"consentrate`

Why can't blondes take coffee breaks? They're too hard to re-train.

Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

What's the similarity between a blond and a postage stamp? You lick 'em, stick 'em, and send them on their way...

How does a blonde spell 'farm'? E-I-E-I-O.

Why are there no dumb brunettes? Peroxide.

How many licks does it take a Blond to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? NONE, They don't lick, they Suck!

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How do you confuse a blond? You don't, they're born that way.

What does "Bones" McCoy say before he performs brain surgery on a blonde? "Space. The final frontier......"

What's black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling? A blonde electrician.

How does a blonde get pregnant? And I thought blondes were dumb!

How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she's pregnant. What will she ask you? "Is it mine?"

What did the mom say to her blonde duaghter before a date? If your not in bed by 12 come home.

Why won't they hire a blonde pharmacist? They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.

How can you tell if a blond is a good cook? She gets the poptart out of the toaster in one piece.

Have you heard Benjamin Moore came out with a new paint color called "blond"? It's not too bright but it spreads real easy.

How do you get a blonde to stay in the shower all day? Lend her your bottle of Shampoo that says "lather, rinse, repeat".